Monday, February 16, 2015

Lighten Up!

By doing a book on Depression, this blog can get pretty "heavy". So what better way is there to even things out and lighten things up a bit other than using pictures?! Hopefully they will put a smile on your face. They make me smile and also warm up my heart......which is good, because there just doesn't seem to be enough warmth right now thanks to the minus 25 degree weather (that's without the wind chill!).

Keziah and her crafting. Here is a snail. If you are wondering why her snail has a tail, well, it's not a tail. It's the snail slime........ yummy.

Speaking of crafting, this girl will collect and forage all kinds of things to use for crafts, even convincing her teacher that she needed the paper plate that held her party food at school to make it into something. Below, you will see white doilies that came from a restaurant that we were at for breakfast, and a dark brown "paper" that she was just thrilled about which I allowed her to keep (it's the sheeting that comes in between chocolate layers, like Pot of Gold).

The crafting usually takes place when this guy naps......and nap he does, every day. It's the reason I am still sane (I know, that could be subjective.....)!! ;o)

But when he is awake, these two are often found together.......once you find them!


Receiving a huge bag of goodies certainly put a smile on our faces.....and an inch or two of fat to keep us warm this winter.

With Nathan over 40 now, I thought for sure he'd be the first one in the family that would need reading glasses. Apparently not.

We did have the stomach flu for a few days, but I knew Lincoln was all better when I went to wake him up in the morning and found this. He looks so innocent, but he's not! He emptied two full wipe packages and opened up all the others. Good thing he is so cute.......

While I know arranged marriages are certainly not the way to go, sometimes I wish we could bend the rules a bit......because then I'd arrange one with this boy to this darling little lovey that has stolen not only my heart, but his as well.


In the past 3-4 weeks or so, we have had a few snowstorms, leaving us with lots of the white stuff. This means snow fun!!!




And it's a good thing we went tobogganing a few weekends ago, because it is just too cold right now to go.




But not being able to go outside so much has not stopped our winter activities. Who needs a dog sled team when you can have your very own stuffie sled team?!

Cold, frigid evenings means coziness, snuggling up with my loved one, with a fire burning in the hearth. Thankful to God for so much to keep us warm day in and day out in this frosty February.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Book Talk: Christians Get Depressed Too - Chapter Two

Chapter Two - The Complexity 

Summary:
After writing in Chapter One eight reasons why we should study depression, Murray uses Chapter Two to deal with the spirit (attitude) in how depression should be approached. He writes about two principles, with the latter one being written about at length. 
The first principle is to Avoid Dogmatism and Seek Humility. That is, while a preacher must preach the Word boldly, clearly and with authority, using the words, "Thus says the Lord", having this dogmatic attitude is not helpful, especially when the Word of God itself is not always dogmatic. And It is not dogmatic with depression. Instead, humility is needed, which means we need to listen, study and speak with the understanding the complexity of depression. 
The second principle is to Avoid Extremes and Seek Balance. Murray spends a great deal of the chapter on this principle, explaining three extremes that need to be avoided:
  1. The Cause is All Physical: the extreme belief that depression has purely physical causes (chemical imbalances) and so it can be corrected by antidepressants, also known as the medical model. Yes, the brain needs chemicals to move our thoughts, and when these chemicals are diminished, the process slows down or stops, and so medication may be required. However, Murray states that to presume that medication is best for everyone is wrong.
  2. The Cause is All Spiritual (shown in two forms):
·         depression is caused by demonic possession and thus requires exorcism
Ø  large emphasis on spiritual warfare, with treatment being the deliverance from these demons
 
·         depression is caused by sin, which requires rebuke, repentance and confession
Ø  the Nouthetic Counseling Movement (Jay Adams): people with depression suffer so due to their unforgiven and unaltered sinful behaviour. To be treated means one needs to be rebuked, which should lead to repentance and conversion. Murray writes about strengths and weaknesses to this movement, a strength being that Adams restored the Biblical’s central role in counseling those with depression. Murray found though that this movement was weak in the fact that Adams does not seem to differentiate between typical mood swings and deeper kinds of depression, and this needs to be done in order to know when to encourage someone to repent, or to throw them a light and lifeline
Ø  The Modern Biblical Counseling Movement (Christian Counseling and Education Foundation): this group has dealt with some of the criticism in Adams’ approach (thankfully), however Murray is concerned about the belief still there, that depression is the result of personal sin, which means to treat with medication is not the answer, only repentance is the cure. Would we take this view if someone has a stroke or Alzheimer’s?
Before going into the third extreme, Murray does explain a bit more about the connection of sin and depression. He believes that depression can *sometimes* be caused by sin, however, we should assume that depression is a result of living in a fallen world rather than think that the person has caused depression by personal sin.
3.      The Cause is All Mental (“in his mind”): that depression is fictional and only is something that people with a weak and fragile mind have. Murray clarifies that depression afflicts all types of people of all walks of life, no matter how strong or temperamental one is. No two depressions are alike, and so we must not paint everyone with the same brush
Murray concludes the chapter with encouraging his readers to keep all of this in mind when dealing with someone (or themselves!) who is struggling with depression. Depression is very, very complex and there are no quick fixes.   
My Thoughts:
Phew. While Murray speaks of depression being complex, I found this chapter to be complex! It took me a bit to get through it, as I had to look up some definitions (i.e. dogmatic). But once I read through the chapter, it all came together. However, this chapter is one I will need to read again. I think my favourite part of it was the quote by Charles Spurgeon:
"It is all very well for those who are in robust health and full of spirits to blame those whose lives are sicklied or covered with the pale cast of melancholy, but the (malady) is as real as a gaping wound, and all the more hard to bear because it lies so much in the region of the soul that to the inexperienced it appears to be a mere matter of fancy and diseased imagination. Reader, never ridicule the nervous and hypochondriacal, their pain in real; though much of the (malady) lies in the imagination (thought-processes) it is not imaginary."
Your Thoughts:
Did you make it through the chapter? Did you make it through my review?! What are your thoughts? Do you find yourself thinking some of those extremes? What do you think of Jay Adams' approach?
Prayer Points:
  • for clarity and wisdom, understanding that depression is different for everyone
  • for those who are stuck in the feelings that they must have depression because their spiritual life is so weak
  • that we may be that light and lifeline to someone, using God's Word
  • for forgiveness in finding ourselves in one or all those extremes mentioned
  • for forgiveness because of lack of humility
  • thankfulness for the medicines, counselors, pastors and others that are helping those in need
Next Time:
Next week Thursday, we will look at Chapter Three: The Condition (of Depression - what is it?)
(I have no idea why this blog post has different fonts and not looking uniformed like all my other Book Talk blog posts. While it is absolutely driving me crazy, bothering that need for things to be "just so", I shall have to leave it be, or else this post will never get posted!)

Monday, February 9, 2015

Before Spring Comes.....

.....I better post these pictures! It just would not be a Canadian blog without at least one post about Winter and Pond Hockey. And seeing as I read somewhere that Spring is (only) 39 days away or so, we better make sure we use that pond of ours.

3 days after we came home from Mexico, we noticed our pond was frozen over and had been for awhile. Yahoo!!! The best part though was that thanks to the wind, we didn't have to shovel a single snowflake off! And when you've got a pond this size, that is *such* a relief:

Last year we couldn't practice our skating skills, as Keziah had bubbles in her head (expanders for her birthmark). So we had some catching up to do! Keziah did very well and was quite thrilled with herself:

We learned quickly that if we wanted Lincoln to try to skate, we had to leave him alone. Every time we tried to help him, he would give up. Every time we left him alone, he would get himself off the chair and give it a try - all on his terms.

It wasn't long before Keziah ditched the chair for a hockey stick!



Lincoln thought it'd be fun to play as well:

It was a fun 10 minutes out on the pond! Actually, that's how long I thought we might be out there, but we actually were out there for over an hour. We ended looking through the ice for the fish :o)

It's a good thing too that we enjoyed the pond that day. A couple days later it was covered in snow. I was then feeling ambitious and shovelled off almost half of it - well, once the kids gave up:


I was so proud of myself, I showed Nathan at night the above picture. He looked at me with pity and asked: did you not see the weather forecast for tomorrow?

Sigh. We were hit with another snowstorm the next day.....and a few days later......and well, again some more snow this past weekend. So no more skating on the pond. The ice is ruined because I shovelled it, which allowed the sun to melt the top layer, and then with the next day's snow, it just is now a big huge rough mess of ice.

Well, there's always painting in the snow!


Friday, February 6, 2015

Before and After

When we moved into our home, we right away took out the existing carpet in the family room and replaced it with very light coloured carpet. Who knew our lives would be changing drastically a few years later, with the adoption of our children?! We sure didn't - otherwise we would *never* had put light carpet in a main room!!

Well, after a number of years and stains later, we knew it was time to do something about it. Having asked around as to what is best, we settled on hardwood-looking vinyl. We needed something that was most durable, that could withstand water, and all that comes with a busy family.

We tackled this project back in the Christmas Holidays, and thanks to a good friend, we were able to get it done!

But before we could get rid of the carpet, we had to empty the room, starting first with this book shelf.....which didn't stay empty for long, thank you Keziah!
 
 

No, your computer screen is not dirty - those are the stains on the carpet. See that big smudge in the middle, slightly to the left? Yeah, that was in front of our couch. Let's all say "Ewwwww" together....


With lots of help, getting this yucky carpet out was no big deal!!
 

Then the kids were dismissed as the real loud tools came out. We took out the tile that was in the room, so that it would be all one floor once completed.

Despite no couch and carpet, important things were still done, like cheering on our team at the World Juniors - especially seeing as there was so much too cheer about (missing that - cheering. My poor Leafs.....:o(

Thankfully, with the help of a good friend, the new vinyl flooring was laid within a day:

And it's done!!
 

And what it looks like today, after all the furniture is back in. We love it!!! And we are very surprised that it is *not* noisy either! And the best part? It is so easy to keep clean.
 

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Christians Get Depressed Too - Chapter One

Welcome to my Book Talk, where we hope to "meet" every Thursday for the next month to read, review, and hopefully discuss the following book:

I hope you were able to order the book and receive it in time. And if you did not order the book, I hope that my reviews on each chapter will give you a good idea as to what the author, David Murray, is trying to get across to his readers. I hope you all are brave enough to comment as well, as we can all learn so much from each other.

On we go!! The set up will be:

Summary of Chapter
My Thoughts
Your Thoughts
Prayer Points
Next Time

Summary
Starting in the Preface, David Murray explains why he wrote this little yet promising book. His choice of title "Christians Get Depressed Too" was to deal with the lie and belief that Christians just don't (and shouldn't) get depressed. Murray describes his book as an emergency guide, using 6 chapters to "explain the condition, the causes, and the cures for both the sufferers and caregivers." He also includes an Appendix on the sufficiency of the Scriptures.

Chapter One: The Crisis:
Not wasting any words, Murray delves right away into the 'why' we need to study this topic, depression (and depression-anxiety), giving 8 reasons:
  1. Because the Bible Speaks about It - not only does the Bible play an important role in the treatment of depression/anxiety, there are many examples in there of others who seem to be down in that dark deep pit of depression. We think of Hannah, Job, and various psalmists.
  2. Because it is So Common - "studies show that 5.8 per cent of men and 9.5 per cent of women will experience depressive episode in any given year". "An estimated 121 million people worldwide suffer from depression"
  3. Because it Impacts our Spiritual Life - we are made up of body and soul, but those two are linked and overlapped by our thoughts and feelings. When one of those suffer (body, soul, thoughts, feelings), it will affect the other 3, which impacts our spiritual life, often leaving one with false guilt, and feelings of worthlessness
  4. Because it May Be Prevented or Mitigated - while many are genetically disposed to have depression, others can also suffer from it as well. Having helpful techniques/strategies can be very useful in preventing, mitigating or shortening the illness, even if that includes medication, which does *not* mean that is a rejection of God and His grace!
  5. Because it Will Open Doors of Usefulness - understanding depression will help us to more sympathetic and useful to those who suffer; learning that to listen the most and speak the least is being most useful to the sufferer
  6. Because it is So Misunderstood - terrible stigmas attached, misunderstandings of its causes, symptoms and possible cures available, due to it being such an invisible disease (no scan will be able to find it like it can find cancer)
  7. Because it is a Talent to be Invested for God - God often uses broken people to bring others to Him
  8. Because We All Can Improve our Mental and Emotional Health - while many of us are not disabled by depression, there are many that experience long-term, low-level depression/anxiety. Learning some strategies that will improve our mental and emotional health is beneficial to all of us.
My Thoughts
The one reason Murray gives that resonates with me is Reason #3. I think I underlined pretty much that whole point! I think that Murray has this one dead on - that body and soul are linked and overlapped by two elements: thoughts and feelings. And I do believe that, in my case anyway, it is such a domino affect. If I get just a simple cold (body), this can result in many unwelcomed feelings (frustration, impatience)  and thoughts (why am I sick now?! I can't be sick now! I sure don't enjoy my days being sick!), which then affects my spiritual walk of life. And that's just with a common flu bug! Those who suffer with more put me to shame.

Murray gives 8 very good reasons why we should learn more about depression, and I hope more of us will become educated on this topic, so that we may be a hand and foot to each other in the Body of Christ.

Your Thoughts
Do any of the reasons strike you? Has Murray missed any reasons? Do you have a reason that he did not write about as to why we should know more about depression/anxiety? Can you think of more examples in the Bible of those who were struggling (that Murray doesn't mention)?

Prayer Points
  • thankful for authors like David Murray, who will tackle this topic with the Bible open
  • thankful for the Psalms
  • for all those who suffer varying degrees of depression/anxiety
  • for wisdom to be able to know when to just listen and keep my mouth shut
  • for the ability to stop judging
  • for God's grace, mercy and love in never letting us go while we are in those darkest moments
Next Time
"In the next chapter, we will consider the attitude and spirit in which we should study depression." pg. 10

Monday, February 2, 2015

It's the First Week of February....

....which means we start our Book Talk! I am quite excited about this book, Christians Get Depressed Too. I can't remember where I heard of this book, or who told me about it, but I do remember thinking last November that it is the book I want to do for Book Talk.

Unless your head is in the sand, er, snow, you will have noticed that over the past few years, awareness about depression has definitely been a lot more on the forefront - the myths, the stigmas, the misunderstandings of it all. I am very thankful that more and more people are talking about it.

I will admit right off the bat - I don't understand depression, and I am very uneducated about it all. Well, uneducated when it comes to the very dark-deep-in-a-pit-can't-get-out-of-bed depression. I do believe that I have a bit of SAD: seasonal affective disorder. The weather definitely can affect me; the lack of sunshine can weigh me down.

I don't remember noticing it so much when I was teaching. The only thing I really noticed in regards to weather was whether the kids could go out for recess or not. That's all I really cared about. It wasn't until I was home fulltime that the grey days got to me. But it'd come and go. I'd be restless, lonely, moody and antsy for a day or two and then that would be it.

However, last October, October 30th to be exact, we had experienced a number of grey days. That particular day we also had some snowflakes. And with each snowflake, my heart became heavier and heavier, to the point of my crying at the supper table. I couldn't breathe when I thought of the fact that it was *just* the beginning of the season and I was already absolutely dreading Winter. Whenever I thought that we have at least 4.5-5 months of this, my chest constricted and it felt like someone was sitting on it.

My anxiety rose as I was quite worried that if I was feeling like this now already, at the end of October, how in the world am I going to get through this winter??!

Well, by God's grace, that out-of-breath, quick to tears and tight chest only lasted for 24 hours, and with thankfulness to Him, it has yet to come back again - praise God!! And that even includes December, where I don't think there was a single full sunny day the whole month!

Well, here we are, with January behind us and February upon us. Winter is still in full force and so the book, Christians Get Depressed Too, seems like such a fitting one......especially this week. Last night and today we were dumped on with snow, and there is more coming in the next days.


 Don't get me wrong, I *love* the snow - when the sun is shining! With that sun shining, it is just so glorious out there!!

So, come join me this Thursday, having read the Preface and Chapter One of Christians Get Depressed Too. My plan is to write a review of the chapter, then my thoughts, ask for your thoughts and end with prayer points. I so look forward to this - to learn more about depression so that I may not only help myself, but those around me.

See you Thursday!!