On We Go...

After a brief hiatus, this blog will be a bit more active. I'd like to thank those of you who commented here, or emailed me or talked to me face-to-face about the purpose of this blog. To receive comments was not my intent for the last post. I just did not want to leave you hanging while I took some time to reflect on the purpose of continuing to blog. Yet, while it was not my intent to solicit feedback, it was definitely encouraging to hear/read what you had to say.

The one comment that stands out the most for me is this one:

The way you are so positive about life and what it brings to you and your family is lovely to read. Where do you get that positive energy from?

Me? Positive?? I have never really thought of myself as a positive person. I actually had to look up the word 'positive' in the dictionary to see what it means and how (if) it applies to me.

This is what I found:

Positive:

• constructive, optimistic, confident, hopeful, forward-thinking, cheerful, buoyant, assured, upbeat
• Synonyms: practical, useful, productive, helpful, pragmatic

Wow. That's quite the description! Does it actually apply to me though? Let me look at a few words there:

confident - well, it depends on how my clothes fit that day and if I can even match an outfit and do my hair that actually looks like I did it

forward-thinking - ha! No, not always; change and I don't always get along

cheerful - most times.....as long as things go my way

buoyant - only in water

helpful - yes, as long as it works for me

productive - not really. If I was, then maybe I'd have projects on the go, like maybe painting some rooms in my home, seeing as I still haven't done a thing to many rooms to make this home 'ours', which we've been living in for over 6 years

practical - this I can claim!!! Yes, I am practical. Just go shopping with me and you'll see how practical I am (I walked out of a consignment shop this past Saturday after going there to buy the kids some jeans. I had received an email from this store, saying that they were having a sale: buy 2 pairs of pants, get 1 free. Perfect! Or so I thought. I went there with high hopes, only to realize that my hopes weren't the only thing high! So were the prices!! They doubled the prices of the pants! $10 for a pair of used jeans?! No thanks.)

pragmatic - well, this requires another dictionary 'look up' so we'll just leave this one be

So back to that word 'positive'. Yes, I do love humour, which can come across as positive. I love to be around people, laughing and talking. I actually need to be around people, unlike my husband, who could spend a whole day not having contact with another human being - and still be sane at the end of the day!! 

But to be honest, being positive is something that can be hard for me. I do not roll with the punches well. I like things my way. I can't be around negative people as they can bring me down easily. 

Maybe I am confusing being positive with being content (now, don't confuse contentment with happy. Two totally different concepts). Being content day in and day out is one of my biggest struggles. I have always had this 'thorn in my side'. My biggest problem is that I am looking all around me for things to make me content, not necessarily material things (remember, I am practical :o). No, it is more that I am looking for contentment in my situation that day or circumstance that I find myself in. 

I forget that when I see the grass is greener on the other side, it's because, well, think about it: what makes grass green? A lot of fertilizer. Or in other words....well, you fill in the blank (crude term for fertilizer, if you need help). To get that green grass 'over there', am I prepared to go through what it takes to get it green?! To receive a lot of fertilizer?!

Content is more than a feeling. It is a state of mind. And when I am looking in my surroundings for my heart to be content, then you can imagine how quickly that feeling comes and goes. One minute I am up and the next minute I am down.

On this path of life, the LORD is definitely teaching me that if I want to be content, I need to look only to Him. He is the only One that can provide this state of mind. And being content does not mean having things go my way, or circumstances that only benefit me, or having all my prayer requests met (goodness me, can you imagine if He actually did grant all of our requests?! Oiy. We'd be in more trouble!! :o)

So am I a positive person? Maybe I am. Maybe I am not. All I know is I pray daily that I am content. In Him, only. This sure relieves the pressures off my husband, children and close friends, knowing that they do not need to provide my contentment!!

I pray that one day, I may confess confidently the same words that Paul writes in Philippians 4: 11-13:

"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have pleny. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."

And who better to know what contentment really means than Paul?! What a life God has led him through!! Once again, pulling out His Word puts things into perspective. 

May you look today in the Right Place for contentment, knowing God's promises of 

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13: 5; Deut. 31: 6